Stomach all tied up in knots

It's all emotional... all this stuff that's happened this week. It's getting to me. Next week doesn't promise to be any better... my birthday is next week.

I have to tell the people who offered me the non radio job that I can't take it because I don't have the money for the license application fee. I don't anticipate having that kind of money any time soon. Hell, if I did have that kind of money, there are other things I need to do with it first.

I feel weak for succumbing to my emotions yet again. It was not a conscious act on my part. It snuck on me and took me totally by surprise. I don't know if this is part of getting older, or what. If it is, I DON'T LIKE IT ONE DAMN BIT!

And this being pulled in a dozen different directions I've been feeling for the last two weeks...? I'm not really thrilled with that either. One direction could mean humiliation; another could mean rejection; still another could be what I hoped and prayed for for over two years; and yet another-- leaving all I know and going Lord knows where to make my dream of working in radio come true.

I guess it's better than not getting old at all... I think of all those young men and women who went to Iraq and didn't make it home.

Puts it all in perpective, doesn't it? Makes my problems so small and insignificant.


And that's all from where I sit.

--MorelaterZ--