Talk is good...
and it answers a lot of questions.
I talked to Saon yesterday for about 45 minutes. He's doing pretty good. He sounded like he was over the cold he had and in good spirits.
He told me some things that I wasn't expecting. First he told me he loved me, and that he would like me to come back down for Mardi Gras. Second, he said that when I was there last month, that may have not been the best time for me to be there because he was financially and transportationally challenged. He said he knew I was miserable because of all the time he had to spend away from me, and he felt bad about that. He also felt bad about what happened between him and that girl, because he knew he had hurt me (a fact I made no secret of), and that the girl was not worth losing me over. In fact, he told her that he may have lost his best friend (me) forever because of her. When he made a comment to the effect that he needed to satisfy a "basic need", I told him that there were plenty of girls in Gretna who could do that for him, and he said, "yeah, maybe, but I can wait for you to come back. You're the one that I want." (When he said that, it was pick my jaw up off the floor time).
He also wants to give "us" another chance, a real chance to see if we really do work together, but now isn't the time for that. I agreed, telling him I needed to get my act together by getting a job and helping my mom out with the bills. Honestly, I can't see myself there on a permanent basis until after Jeff graduates next May. Saon wants to have his license and his truck on the road before we make any plans for me to move in with him, so that I could get to and from a job (yeah, like I can see myself driving that behemoth of a truck!).
I asked him if I was still his girl, and he said yes, that I am. He said in so many words that I've been his girl since we met 14 months ago, but that he hasn't always treated me as such.
Still in all, as much as it was good to hear Saon say those things, and take ownership of the situations that made me feel I had to leave, we still have a long way to go. A lot can happen between now and Mardi Gras. It may be good, and it may be bad. Maybe this thinking positive stuff that JC advocates is not such a bad way to go. But again, it's a long road, and I have to take it one step at a time.
MorelaterZ--
I talked to Saon yesterday for about 45 minutes. He's doing pretty good. He sounded like he was over the cold he had and in good spirits.
He told me some things that I wasn't expecting. First he told me he loved me, and that he would like me to come back down for Mardi Gras. Second, he said that when I was there last month, that may have not been the best time for me to be there because he was financially and transportationally challenged. He said he knew I was miserable because of all the time he had to spend away from me, and he felt bad about that. He also felt bad about what happened between him and that girl, because he knew he had hurt me (a fact I made no secret of), and that the girl was not worth losing me over. In fact, he told her that he may have lost his best friend (me) forever because of her. When he made a comment to the effect that he needed to satisfy a "basic need", I told him that there were plenty of girls in Gretna who could do that for him, and he said, "yeah, maybe, but I can wait for you to come back. You're the one that I want." (When he said that, it was pick my jaw up off the floor time).
He also wants to give "us" another chance, a real chance to see if we really do work together, but now isn't the time for that. I agreed, telling him I needed to get my act together by getting a job and helping my mom out with the bills. Honestly, I can't see myself there on a permanent basis until after Jeff graduates next May. Saon wants to have his license and his truck on the road before we make any plans for me to move in with him, so that I could get to and from a job (yeah, like I can see myself driving that behemoth of a truck!).
I asked him if I was still his girl, and he said yes, that I am. He said in so many words that I've been his girl since we met 14 months ago, but that he hasn't always treated me as such.
Still in all, as much as it was good to hear Saon say those things, and take ownership of the situations that made me feel I had to leave, we still have a long way to go. A lot can happen between now and Mardi Gras. It may be good, and it may be bad. Maybe this thinking positive stuff that JC advocates is not such a bad way to go. But again, it's a long road, and I have to take it one step at a time.
MorelaterZ--
My name is Stef, and I approve this post. Posted @ 12:51 PM
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