Neko

Saturday, January 15, 2005

Feed a cold-- yeah, right

I got new for all of you who live by that adage to "feed a cold, starve a fever"-- it doesn't always work.

All I get from it is an upset stomach. And it doesn't make me feel any better.

I went to Panera today and got a mocha latte. I was asked if I wanted it in a "to go" cup, or a mug. Since I was staying, I said a mug.

What a mug it was, too! This thing was nothing more than a huge coffee cup, or a cup that would hold soup or stew.

But now, I have a belly ache from drinking it. It's something like 28 degrees outside, so I thought that something warm would be just the ticket. It was, but it was waaaaay too much! Gimme the "to go" cup next time.

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I got this crazy idea today. I'm researching some locations for a story I have an idea for. It's kinda hard to do when you can't go there personally and check things out.

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My SSA appointment is on Thursday at 10am, and I'm kind of looking forward to it. I hope that the doctor will ask me questions about how I feel mentally. Have I got a story for him! I took the time to write down the things I've noticed in the last two years, and it's not a pretty picture IMHO. It's down right frightening! I think I know me better than anyone else, and if I've noticed these things, I'm amazed that no one has noticed. Or, maybe they have and just have written me off as a "drama queen" and ignored it all together.

Believe me, I don't do things soley for attention. I think I'm a little beyond that. I'm more like I want to hide what's wrong with me, but sometimes, it's quite difficult to do. Especially the physical pain from the FMS. Which is why it upsets me that certain members of my family think I'm faking the whole thing. Believe you me, I couldn't fake this if I tried. If there were no unbearable pain to deal with, I'd probably still be in Massachusetts, still working, and would have never gone to the Bangor State Fair 2 1/2 years ago.

And from the physical pain, comes the mental pain.

So I hope that this appointment goes well. Beats watching the Inauguration on TV.

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That's all from where I sit.

--MorelaterZ--