Neko

Thursday, September 25, 2003

Must...kill...old...computer...

Here i am at the Edmond library again. Can't seem to stay online at home long enough to get anything done. I would just like an hour to surf where I don't have to reconnect 4 or 5 times.

My internet connection problems are so bad, that yesterday, I was having an IM with Darlene, and it kept cutting me off. By the time I got back online, she was gone. Since Tuesdays and Wednesdays are her only days off, I might not hear from her again until next week. That sucks.

Found a couple of places in the paper where I just might submit my resume. It's call center stuff, which i know I can do, but I just don't know about sitting for eight hours a day, every day.

To comment on the recent upheaval in my life, I'll just paraphrase something I wrote back in June: that I am possibly the only person who cares for him without an agenda. I'm not his family (and why he's trying to impress some of those people, I have no idea), and I'm not his soon to be ex wife. I only pray that he realizes that I really do care for him and about him. If it's meant to be, then it will be. Right now, all we need is time, and a chance to talk. I have nothing to be ashamed about about who I am. I am secure in who I am. I'm not so sure he can say the same. Perhaps with a little time and thought, he will work thru whatever is eating away at him like a cancer and give his life another chance.

Man, that felt good! Now maybe my stomach will stop hurting, and I'll have something resembling an appetite.

MorelaterZ--