I'm going crazy! Get me the hell outta here!

I've just about had it with everyone and everything that has to do with my staying here. Between my mother's apathy and my sister's bitchiness, I'm just about at the breaking point.

The big losers here would be the boys.

But as long as I stay here and am not able to find a job, I am just a burden on everyone. I don't see any way I can stay here any longer. I might end up in the loony bin before long.

I can't take this anymore. It's not like anything that I expected when I came here. I thought I'd have no problem finding a job. I thought that I could get disability from Social Security, but that is a long, drawn out process. I might have a hearing as soon as next month, but who knows?

All i know at this point is that when I get some money and take care of some obligations, I'm leaving Oklahoma, and I won't return until I can take care of myself. It's better for everyone all around if I do.

Saon wasn't exactly thrilled when I told him I was thinking about going back to New England...why should he care, it's not like we have a future together or anything.

He got what he thinks he wanted...to fix his marriage. He must like being miserable. I thought he was happy with me. I guess I was way wrong on that one.

MorelaterZ--